Wednesday, July 27, 2005

The problem with being the sort of girl who does things like go to bars all by herself is that one generally has to deal with certain questions:

"Hey there, what are you doing all alone?"

"Considering changing my career path to barfly."

"Need a degree for that?"

"No, I'd just have to learn how to ooze sad glamour, like I'd once believed that I could do everything but now am not sure that I'm allowed believe I can do anything."

"That all?"

"Well, I'd also have to learn to consume cocktails at the exact right speed so that I become confessional but not sloppy. I'm a little young for the job, but I'm a quick learner."

"It sounds like you've got it all figured out."

"Does it? I'm really just making this up as I go along. But maybe it's more of a viable option than I had thought."

It isn't so much that I mind needles--a girl who likes tattoos as much as I do couldn't possibly. But I do not like being injected. I do not like the way it feels, and I do not like that my arm will hurt all day tomorrow. You should just keep telling me that this trip is worth all of this.

The Math and Physics Club show is tomorrow night, and you all better be coming with me. Is anyone surprised that I like them so much? Sometimes I stop and realize how ridiculously hopeful I continue to be, and it kills me. My belief in magic is going to be what does me in.

Dear samantha,

Being bold does not work for you, and you ought to go back to being shy and flustered. That doesn't work for you either, but at the very least it doesn't work for you in ways that you are accustomed to.


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