On the bus:
"So I have this boil on my leg, right..."
"You have a what? A boil? How do you know it's a boil?"
"Dude, what else could it be? Do you want to look at it?"
"No."
"Fine. So, I have this boil. And the other day, I was wearing shorts."
"I hate this conversation already."
"This girl walked up while I was waiting for the bus and asked what the thing on my leg was. I told her I thought it was a boil."
"Was she cute?"
"Yeah. That's the point of this story. See, 'cause in the end, I got her phone number."
"Dude. If you get a girlfriend because of a boil, we're not friends anymore."
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